


Strong

by LibbyWrites



Category: One Direction (Band), Zayn Malik (Musician)
Genre: Love Confessions, Lyric Wheel Challenge, M/M, One Shot, Song Lyrics, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-08 16:03:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7764196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LibbyWrites/pseuds/LibbyWrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis introduced Liam to Zayn thinking it would help Zayn look a little less bored. He ended up changing his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strong

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for the song Strong on the [1D Lyric Wheel Challenge](http://1dlyricwheel.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr. The challenge consists of writing a little fic, including at least three lines from the song they select for each writer. The lines can't be sung or be part of a poem, they have to be either narration or dialogue.
> 
> As always, I need to thank my beta and the love of my literary life, [Marea](http://archiveofourown.org/users/marea707/pseuds/marea707). 
> 
> PS: I don't own these people. I don't even know them.

“Tell ‘im,” Louis mumbled, rolling his eyes so hard they almost went all white. Zayn groaned, letting his head fall, his forehead hitting the table in front of him.

“You don’t understand,” Zayn complained, not even bothering to lift his head to look at him. Louis was a moron and he had no idea what it was like. It was much more complicated that just ‘telling him’.

Mostly because friendship was never something that came easily to Zayn. He was baffled every time he met that kind of people that have hundreds of friends and hang out with them all the time. You know, social butterflies that thrive on having lots of friends and acquaintances around them, people that only need to speak two words to have a whole crowd just paying attention. People like Louis, really. Louis baffled Zayn all the time. That’s why Zayn seldom went out with Louis when he invited him on a night out. It would always end up with Louis saying hi to practically everyone around them, chatting and dancing with every person he met, most of the time forgetting Zayn was even there. Sitting on the bar and passing the time people watching with a drink in his hand was how most of those nights ended for Zayn.

Except for that one night Louis came back to the bar with an amused twinkle in his eyes, dragging an embarrassed looking guy behind himself. Zayn remembers raising an eyebrow at Louis, wondering what the hell was happening. Until Louis said Zayn looked bored so he brought him a friend, and proceeded to introduce the guy to him, just because they were both geeks. Liam. It took Zayn a second to fall helplessly in love. It took one smile from Liam, all crinkly eyes and blushing cheeks and he was gone. He figured Liam was, like Louis said, just an old college friend, he figured it was a chance meeting and he would never see Liam smile again after that small fleeting introduction. He was wrong. Liam decided he had enough dancing for the night and stayed at the bar with Zayn, sipping on drinks and chatting nonstop while Louis went back to the dancefloor.

They actually never stopped talking. Almost literally, because talking about superheroes that night ended up with Liam barely able to hide his glee when Zayn told him he had an original edition of The Killing Joke, and them exchanging numbers because ‘that’s so cool, Zayn, d’you reckon I could see it some day?’

That day happened after a week of texting and talking on the phone constantly. Zayn didn’t think he ever met anyone he could talk to the way he talked to Liam. Always so natural, always so honest, always receiving sweet enthusiastic reactions from Liam that left him shaking and wanting to scream inside. And after that day, many more days came, because they had too many things in common. For some ridiculous reason, Liam appeared to enjoy Zayn’s company just as much as Zayn enjoyed Liam’s, and that just didn’t happen often.

Weeks turned into months and months into years and Liam just became a permanent fixture in Zayn’s life. Everywhere he went, Liam was most likely there with him, sharing endless game nights and dinners and simple conversations over coffee or beers. And Zayn’s love for Liam refused to die. It simply grew exponentially, taking so much space in Zayn’s chest it made it hard to breathe.

It was embarrassing and obvious to the point of Louis noticing. Oblivious Louis, always too distracted to notice anything, one day simply stated matter of factly that Zayn should just tell Liam about his feelings. He didn’t even need to ask if there were any feelings to talk about. He knew. Probably the whole planet knew. The whole planet but Liam.

“What do I not understand, man?” Louis asked, clearly annoyed. “It’s simple, isn’t it? You both have feelings for each other. Just talk about it. Tell ‘im.” He said like it was nothing, grabbing an apple from the fruit basket that was sitting at the center of the table with no intention of eating it.

Zayn groaned again, turning his head, leaving his cheek against the cold glass of Louis’ dining table. “That’s the problem. That’s exactly the problem. It’s not mutual. I would’ve noticed.”

Louis laughed and shook his head, tossing the fruit in the air again and again, catching it every time. “For such a brilliant guy, you can be pretty thick sometimes.” Louis smiled through his words, raising his eyebrows like he was making an obvious point by insulting Zayn.

“’m not thick, asshole.” Zayn spat, more sad than angry, finally lifting his head from the table. “He doesn’t feel the same, and you know… If I say something, everything will change. This friendship I have with him is too precious, I can’t lose him.” Zayn explained, because he had a point. Because it was obvious. If he ever told Liam about how he felt, he was going to lose him, sooner or later.

Louis finally kept the apple in his hand, bending a bit to talk closer to Zayn, in a lower, almost loving tone. “Think of all the people that miss their chance out of fear, Zayn. Think of how much love's been wasted. You know, people always trying to escape it, they move on to stop their heart breaking. D’you want that to be you? Regretting your silence many years from now?”

Zayn sighed, letting his forehead hit the table again, closing his eyes. Louis had a point too. Everything was already getting ruined already anyways, wasn’t it? He hadn’t seen Liam in a month out of fear of fucking up because every time his heart reacted to all the beautiful things Liam did, he was scared his body would betray him and reveal his reaction too. He was trapped. Whatever he did he was sure he was going to lose Liam, and it was terrifying. “It’s just too complicated, Lou. You wanna know why it is so hard to say it? Because I know he’s keeping things from me too. There’s so many words we're not saying. I mean, I’m sure he has noticed by now, why won’t he say anything? He could just, I don’t know, reject me outright, but no. He just… He just won’t. He’s too kind.” Zayn thought out loud, not moving from his place.

“Oh for fuck’s sake, just fucking tell him!” Louis groaned, throwing the apple at Zayn’s head.

~

That same night Zayn’s will broke and he called Liam. No, not to ‘tell him’ Like Louis said. Just to see him, because he missed him like crazy, because Liam was like a battery plugged directly into his life, always giving him energy when he felt depleted. Just a smile from Liam was enough to make him feel warm inside. Just making Liam laugh was more rewarding than anything else in the world. Just being around Liam made him feel better than anything else in the world.

After a few hours of Liam beating the fuck out of Zayn at FIFA because Zayn was too distracted and after eating pizza and ice cream, they ended up in the same place they always did. Cuddling on Zayn’s ratty couch, almost one on top of the other, sharing secrets and smiles and little touches that drove Zayn mad. These moments made the fact that he fell in love so easily with Liam make so much sense. Zayn wasn’t a touchy person, he never was. He liked keeping his personal space as free as possible and to be honest, he never really knew how to express his feelings in a physical way. Words were always more useful, words were safer. And then Liam came. Liam and the way he elbowed Zayn on the ribs every time he laughed like it was totally okay to do that. Liam and the hugs he gave Zayn out of the blue, just because. Liam and how perfectly he fit by Zayn’s side. Liam and the way he smelled and the warmth of his body and the strength of his hands. Zayn knew it was a lost battle from the beginning and he just let himself enjoy this closeness, even when it made everyone that knew Zayn look at them curiously. Liam’s presence was just too intoxicating, too delicious. Liam was just the exception to every one of Zayn’s rules.

It was simply natural, the way they always ended up like that. Laying on the couch, so close to one another, talking in hushed voices or simply sharing that kind of comfortable silences people don’t get to enjoy often. Zayn closed his eyes for a moment, his head on Liam’s chest. Liam’s fingers were softly running through his hair. Ever since that time two years ago when Liam told him his hair looked great when it was longer, he just stopped cutting it. He shaved the sides, yeah, just because of that one time Liam told him that looked sick. Zayn was practically purring, basking in Liam’s warmth, his fears and problems far from his mind.

At least until Liam sighed, making Zayn’s head move up and down on his chest. Zayn just smiled, sighing was something Liam did a lot and he loved the little sound. “I missed you so much,” Liam whispered, and Zayn opened his eyes.

Everything came back to him in a rush, especially the reason why Liam missed him. It was Zayn that had avoided Liam for a month, terrified of slipping up. It was Zayn’s turn to sigh, moving the arm that was holding Liam to place his hand carefully on Liam’s chest. “’m sorry.” Zayn whispered back, the guilt so evident in his voice it made him cringe.

“Is everything okay? Between us, I mean. Did I do something to…?” Liam asked, and Zayn frowned, looking up at him, because no, god no, much on the contrary.

“No, Li, not at all. We’re okay, we… I…” finding the right words to pronounce any of the excuses he had rehearsed in his head was impossible.

Liam’s hand halted its movement on his hair but it stayed where it was, cradling Zayn’s head and fuck, Zayn was melting in an infuriating mix of love and fear. But Liam smiled, looking at him with those huge, earnest, gorgeous brown eyes. “You know… I never… I mean… You do know you’re important to me, right? Like, the most important person in my life right now?” Zayn’s brows furrowed even further, his heart beating so hard it was a miracle it wasn’t audible. He knew they meant a lot to each other but hearing it like that, from Liam’s mouth, in his arms, was an experience wasn’t sure he could survive. “I hate missing you like that. I… sometimes I feel my hands and your hands are like… they’re tied up, like two ships, drifting, weightless, and waves try to break that and I just… I can’t let that happen, I feel like I’d do anything to save it. Do you understand what I’m saying?” Liam grabbed Zayn’s hand from his chest, interlacing their fingers, laughing a little self-deprecating laugh that was so endearing it took all of Zayn’s energy not to kiss his lips fiercely. He just bit his own lower lip, smiling at Liam, temporarily blinded by Liam’s light to actually try to process the words he said.

“Um… what are you saying?” Zayn asked, suddenly confused because Liam’s words did make some kind of sense, he did feel something similar, but he was pretty sure their reasons for feeling that way were fundamentally different.

Liam just smiled. It wouldn’t be the first time he had to repeat himself because Zayn was too distracted by him to pay any attention to the actual words he was saying. Liam moved a little on the couch to get even closer to Zayn, the both of them on their sides, face to face, in each other’s arms. “I’m saying I need you. I’m saying you make me strong.” Liam stated, his sweet strawberry ice cream breath tickling Zayn’s lips, making him dizzy, turning his thoughts into syrup. “I’m saying… I’m saying these past few days away from you made me fear maybe I’m just being too… too much and maybe you needed space, you know, from me… But at the same time they were hell to me 'cause when I'm not with you I'm weaker. Us being apart just made me realize how much you really mean to me and that I can’t keep just wasting time, you know? I don't wanna wait 'til it's gone, whatever this is, between you and me.”

Zayn had to be dreaming. He just had to be still in his bed, fantasizing about how wonderful it would be if one day Liam beat him to it and actually confessed his love, tired of waiting for Zayn to actually gather the courage to do it, helping him take that leap. There was no way Liam was saying what he seemed to be saying. No way. Things just don’t work that way. Hope and dread gripped Zayn’s heart in equal measure, threatening to rip it in half. “I don’t understand?” he basically croaked, the words barely managing to escape his constricted throat, sounding tiny and desperate.

Liam took a moment to sigh again and maybe gather his thoughts, rearrange his words, find another way of conveying his message. “I’m saying I love being close to you, you’re just so amazing, so… so beautiful, and I think I love you. I mean, I think I’m in love with you. I think being your friend is wonderful but it doesn’t feel like enough anymore and I don’t wanna lose you but I just can’t keep this a secret.” Liam explained, his face getting closer to Zayn’s, his smile replaced by a little frown that looked so out of place on his face. “I need you so much and I’m not scared of love, I’m not scared of loving you. It’s losing you that terrifies me, and I’m here saying these things because something in my heart tells me maybe… maybe you feel the same?” he asked cautiously, hopefully, looking into Zayn’s eyes, holding his hand tightly, still cradling his head like Zayn was worth the world.

Zayn’s vision went blurry with tears in a second. He held onto Liam’s hand tight, trying to process what he just heard. Trying to process the fact that Liam loved him. Liam loved him. That was a real thing that was really happening and beautiful, perfect Liam was actually saying the same words Zayn spent years hiding out of fear. Liam took that fear and he obliterated it in a second, changing Zayn’s entire reality for ever, changing his life.

“Please say something?” Liam begged, sounding concerned. “Are you okay?” Zayn barely registered Liam letting go of his hand to run his fingers over his cheeks. Oh fuck, those were tears. Zayn was actually crying. Zayn was probably letting Liam think this wasn’t okay, he was probably making Liam feel on the brink of rejection.

“Fuck…” Zayn gasped in a broken sob that somehow turned into laughter halfway. “I love you too, Li.” He finally, _finally_ confessed, and before Liam could do anything else, he finally, _finally_ kissed Liam’s lips.


End file.
